11 May

My dog died today.

He wasn’t so much my dog as my family’s dog, really.  He was my grandfather’s dog, then my father’s dog, but he lived in our house and was happy to see me when I came home, and therefore he’s my dog, if only a little bit.  I thought I was a cat person until Feller, but he was such an appealing little guy.  He had such simple wants and needs.

He wanted to sit next to you.  He wanted to follow you out into the field.  He wanted to be a farm dog.  He wanted some of what you were cooking, and he wanted to do his tricks for you, but he didn’t actually care that much about the treats that came after.  He wanted you to put his leash on.  He wanted the thunder to stop.  He wanted you to call him a good dog.

That’s what’s so heartbreaking about dogs, I think.  They want so little, and it’s impossible to explain why sometimes they can’t have it.  You can’t make a dog understand why he can’t come up on the couch, or eat from the table, or any of those little rules.  You can’t tell him why he has to get in the car, and why he can’t come home.

dogandyard 006

Goodbye, Feller.  You were a good dog.


Posted by on May 11, 2009 in Uncategorized


8 responses to “dog

  1. lisa

    May 11, 2009 at 4:50 pm

    Even though you only knew him for a little bit, it sounds like Feller has been one of the family for years. I’m sorry for your loss.

  2. amanda

    May 11, 2009 at 4:51 pm

    I’m so sorry. The loss of a pet is utterly heartbreaking.

  3. James

    May 11, 2009 at 6:16 pm

    My sympathies to you, dear friend.

  4. LeeAnn

    May 11, 2009 at 10:17 pm

    I am so sorry to hear of your loss Jessica. I never really thought of myself as a dog person either, but I know how much the dogs we have now mean to me and how hard it was to lose our puppy last December. Now that we have ten 4 week old pups in the house its hard not to get too attached to them either, because they will need to find new homes no matter how much we want to keep them. At least if Feller had any aches and pains of old age he won’t be suffering any longer.

  5. Sal

    May 12, 2009 at 7:14 am

    Oh honey, my heart goes out to you.

  6. Katie

    May 12, 2009 at 10:34 am

    What a beautiful post! So sorry it had to be about something sad…

  7. Brittney

    May 12, 2009 at 3:04 pm

    Your house really isn’t going to be the same without the Dawg. 😦

  8. cousinkelly

    May 22, 2009 at 9:27 pm

    Noooooo!!!! I had no idea! Poor little guy- so sad. I think Feller and the choco-holic Dudey were the first dogs either of us were around. Remember “Feller Maids” from when we were slightly older than babies?


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