one purse to rule them all

07 Mar

I am pretty much a hobbit.

I am not saying this as any sort of insult to hobbits.  Peace, my tiny brothers!  I am of your people!  My father’s name is even Bill Bagley, the obvious modern equivalent of Bilbo Baggins.  I am just trying to provide reference for my own stubbitude, although reference may not be necessary.  I am five foot one.  I am pink-cheeked, shaggy-haired, curvy-round, and the tops of my feet have a fine peach fuzz growing on them.  I look very much like I popped out of a hole in Middle Earth and I am on my way to second breakfast.

I don’t actually mind this.  I love my height, and I think my shape is adorable (I’m kind of like an hourglass that somebody dropped a bowling ball on).  I am able to fit in many small places, and rarely have to duck when walking under low-hanging branches.  However, my size makes fashion difficult.  According to the industry, people my size don’t exist.  I can either have a proper waistband and hems that drag in the dirt, or proper hems and a waistband that slowly removes my ability to bear children.  It doesn’t help that most designers think ‘petite’ is French for ‘shaped like an anvil’.

Oddly enough, I’ve noticed this hobbit style problem much less with things like pants and shirts, and much more with purses.

I desperately need a new purse.  My old one looks like this:

It deserves to be on the floor.  In the corner.

It deserves to be on the floor. In the corner

I’ve had it for several years.  It’s almost exactly like the purse I had before that, except for the burgundy.  I thought the burgundy was a pretty crazy move (although the uh camo belt?  felt like an obvious decision).  Next, I thought, possibly I would bust out some pants that weren’t corduroy.  Or a shirt that fit. But I think I’ve grown up enough that I can actually get a real purse.  I mean, I have a pair of long black pants.  I have a button-down shirt.  I have a pair of SEXY BOOTS, even.  And now I can get a purse that makes a statement.

Secret:  I want it to be shiny.

And bold.

And uh cheap, because dammit I can’t shell out eighty bucks for a purse.

In my mind, ‘Statement Making’ means bright purple and shiny enough to signal a satellite, but as I’ve been roaming the internet looking for bags I like, I’ve been discovering some pretty bold pieces of different kinds.

I really love these:

$29.80 at Forever 21

$29.80 at Forever 21

$22.80 at Forever 21

$22.80 at Forever 21

$22.99 at Target

$22.99 at Target

$32.99 at Target

$32.99 at Target

The potential problem with these bags is that, considering how short and stumpy my body is, a normal sized purse makes me look like a turtle drowning in its own shell.  That green one looks especially appealing…I kind of dig the retro feel.  But my shopping method includes at least a month of waffling around my choices and being dissatisfied with every available option, followed by a few weeks of optimism and three more months of despair, and maybe throw in a year of uncertainty before I make a purchase.

If I start that now, I should have a new purse in time for the apocalypse.


Posted by on March 7, 2009 in Life


Tags: , ,

15 responses to “one purse to rule them all

  1. LeeAnn

    March 7, 2009 at 7:04 am

    You should check out Ross for purses too… I usually see a good variety there. Macy’s clearance can also have some WONDERFUL purses for a good deal. 🙂

    I really have no room to talk about cheap purses anymore though, as Johnny let me get/got me a $400 one.

    • saturdayjane

      March 8, 2009 at 4:14 am

      You spoiled brat you! 😉 I actually did check Ross, the last time I was there. I was surprised by how expensive they were! Didn’t find anything then, but I’ll keep checking!

      • LeeAnn

        March 8, 2009 at 5:32 am

        Yeah, sometimes they can be spendy there…. like it depends on the season for some reason.

  2. amanda

    March 7, 2009 at 7:35 am

    I, too, am hobbit sized and hourglass-shaped. I’ve pretty much given up on finding purses proportional to my body, since the only ones I’ve come across that fit that description have Dora the Explorer on them and are being wielded by toddlers. I actually carry super-huge bags, since I carry enough crap to make a Boy Scout look ill-prepared.

    • saturdayjane

      March 8, 2009 at 4:10 am

      Hehe, I do love big giant bags. “And when I am tired, I can NAP in it!” 😉

  3. Winona

    March 7, 2009 at 7:17 pm

    I love the first black one a lot but the green one is especially lovely! Perfect for a chic, short grad student, I say!

    • saturdayjane

      March 8, 2009 at 4:08 am

      I do totally dig the green one! I haven’t actually SEEN it in a Target, but I’m starting to consider ordering it online! I’ve never actually bought non-electronics online, and the thought is pretty thrilling.

  4. Karina

    March 8, 2009 at 12:20 am

    I like the first one from Forever 21. Its good for shorties because you can always alter the across the body strap if its too long (or even just knot it at the top!)

    • saturdayjane

      March 8, 2009 at 4:03 am

      Ooh, I’ve never thought of knotting it! That black one seems to be quite popular!

  5. Laura

    March 8, 2009 at 5:39 pm

    According to my mom, everything at Macy’s is on mad clearance, but that’s because it’s ugly. May or may not be worth a trip.

  6. lisa

    March 8, 2009 at 11:17 pm

    Haha purse-shopping is always a process more epic than anything Tolkien wrote for me as well! I did a blog post with purse-shopping tips a while back. Good luck with your decision!

    • saturdayjane

      March 9, 2009 at 6:29 am

      That’s a very helpful post! I’m definitely not an impulse buyer, but I’ve never thought of stuffing the store model with my usual purse contents. That’s an excellent idea!

  7. Kitty

    March 8, 2009 at 11:34 pm

    Have you looked on Etsy? There are some really beautiful and very original bags there, and you could probably contact a store owner and have one made to suit. In the end, this is your mission, and yours alone. Good luck little one!

    • saturdayjane

      March 9, 2009 at 6:26 am

      I really love browsing Etsy! I get nervous about some of their prices, though. All of the handmade bags are understandably expensive! I’ve started a bookmark list though, of my favorites. Maybe that’d be a good splurge piece!


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