Dear Ill-Fitting Sweater

05 Mar

Dear Ill-Fitting Sweater,

I am writing to notify you that as of now, I am terminating our relationship.

Let me clarify.  We’ve been done for years, Ill-Fitting Sweater.  I haven’t been very clear about it, and that’s my own fault . I undestand that it’s hard for you to know that it’s over when I keep coming back to you.  It’s hard not to.  You’re so easy to be with!  You never asked anything of me.  You were simple and undemanding and so…so comfortable.  All you wanted was to be near me.

But seriously, it was bad for the both of us.  I felt lost when I was with you, Ill-Fitting Sweater.  I felt ugly inside.  The longer I was with you, the more I realized you just weren’t what I wanted anymore.  You were constantly droopy.  You slouched.  I can’t remember you complimenting me, or flattering me, not once.  You never made me feel pretty.

And the whole time I was with you, I could see how other girls felt about their shirts.  There was such a connection there.  They looked so beautiful together.  And you and I…we never had that.  I think, ultimately, I wore you because I knew that I could, and I was scared of trying something different.  And so I ended it.

Somehow, though, I kept coming back to you, and sweaters just like you.

I can’t help it.  It’s just what I’m attracted to.  I’m in a store, I look around, and I see a shapeless baggy mess of a knitted top, and I think yeah, that’s where I want to be.  I want in on some of that.  And besides, I already had a rapport with you.  You were green.  I liked green.  You were soft.  I liked soft.  You were so wonderfully, lovably familiar that I didn’t have to face an unexpected self in the mirror when I put you on (not that I could see any real semblance of my body when I wore you.)

No matter how many times I ended it, swore to myself that I’d never put you on again, I would always come back and spend the day feeling ugly and…unambitious.  It wasn’t fair to us.  Somewhere there was a fitted blouse waiting for me, and you were headed towards a bright future as somebody’s dustrag.

So this is it, Ill-Fitting Sweater.  I swear this is final.  You are going to the Goodwill, and I am going to get that sexy wrap top that I’ve been eyeing.  I’ m ready for a healthy shirt that makes me feel good about myself, and you aren’t going to stand in my way anymore.

We’ll always have highschool.




Posted by on March 5, 2009 in Letters


Tags: , ,

3 responses to “Dear Ill-Fitting Sweater

  1. amanda

    March 5, 2009 at 11:09 pm

    Everyone has at least one ill-fitting sweater. I have 2, plus a plethora of holey, stretched-out, ill-fitting T-shirts. Sometimes I’ll wear them when running to the grocery store and realize I’ve found the path to my very own “What Not to Wear” special.

    P.S. That Forever shirt is super-hot. I may have to seek one out for myself.

    • saturdayjane

      March 6, 2009 at 1:08 am

      Oh, What Not To Wear. I like to watch it while wearing sweatpants and graphic tees, just to be a hypocrite.

      I’m starting to seriously dig Forever 21. It was the sort of store I used to be afraid of because it was full of Statement Making Pieces (and also, their clothes aren’t of the highest quality) but every time I’m in the mall, now, it’s my number one stop!

  2. lemonlove

    March 6, 2009 at 5:30 am

    GO GO GO GO GO! I love reading your letters and your little personal statements of empowerment. Wonderful, daaahling.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: